Sometimes, I still feel the pressure of creating a ‘perfect’ experience for myself– even though I’ve done a lot of work on unlearning the flavor of perfectionism.
I’m human and of course, it still creeps in at times.
Instead of going down that spiral today– I’m going to begin again from a place where I greet my messy moments with grace.
Places where I fall over and remember I know how to get back up.
A few weeks’ ago, when I was deep in sadness– I told my husband I was drowning.
He said in return, “Stacey, you know how to swim“.
Ah, hot damn.
In that moment, I wanted him to wallow with me, but instead he threw me one of the round life-saving devices from the shore.
As much as I didn’t want to like what he said, it was exactly what I needed.
A small powerful cold water truth to my desire to be rescued in that moment.
He was right– I can rescue myself.
It didn’t mean I immediately pulled myself out of those waters– but it gave me the lifeline I knew I could use when I was ready.
When we stumble or fall or feel like we are drowning– we can be in those messy spaces and feel the feelings– even flail around.
When we are ready, and not a minute before, we can remind ourselves we know how to get up again, to swim ashore.
And here, in these imperfect experiences— is the magic of living.
Wherever you find yourself- beloved, know that you can fall or falter and that –-instead of messing it all up— may be the exact way forward.